... about the Nigerian Election

The 2015 presidential election is about a month away. Almost every Nigerian has their eyes, ears and mouth set to February 2015 in what appears to be the most polarising elections Nigeria has witnessed in recent memory. 

Before I get into this article, a few things to make clear include the quest to be as objective as can be, and to emphasise that I refuse to take sides on this issue, and to remind the reader that I am no political analyst, merely a concerned Nigerian citizen that, like many others, hopes for the best for Nigeria and its people. 

I take it that most Nigerians are tired of the borderline depressing state of Nigeria and want to start seeing some positive changes happen and achieving this is no easy task. In the past four years, Nigeria's situation has gone from bad to worse, and if I could visualise the country in graph form, it would have hit a negative value by now. Security is terrible, embezzlement is at an all time high, straight up ridiculous. The way in which committees are set up and funds are mismanaged, almost as it will be should an adult give a toddler some papers and colour with the instruction to draw a cat. The result will be a colourful mess. Clearly, whoever is set to lead this country from this year and for the next four years, has serious work awaiting. That being said, it will also be dishonest to say no good has been achieved in the past four years, I am certain that there has been some achievements, even though I cannot think of one at the time of writing. 

My concern is not so much about the candidates, but the antics employed by either camp and their supporters. The bigotry, the name calling, the accusations on both sides is very childish and amateur. We are suffering, and we need results, not insults. Save that for something less important. At my age, I cannot recall the last time something positive happened in Nigeria for an extended period of time. People don't want to watch adults argue of silly things, people want jobs, security, people want to eat. This is made even more painful through the realisation that Nigeria has the potential to be a true giant, not just within Africa but the world at large. 

Nigerians have suffered, and the true and honest people of Nigeria have no space for hypocrisy and bigotry in their hearts, honest Nigerians want nothing but positive change for all, and they know of the things needed to achieve just that. In an ideal world, everything leading up to next month will involve peaceful debates about policies, investments, developement of strategies for dealing with current issues e.t.c. And not just across the two leading political parties and their candidates, but between the citizens of the nation. 

The most important thing, which people seem to forget (ACROSS BOTH CAMPS) is that this is supposedly a democracy and people have the right to vote for whoever they feel best represents a positive Nigeria, without causing a fight. The debates we ought to be having right now should not at all be about muslim/christian, ogogoro or gulder. The debates we should be having should be about real issues that we are actually suffering from, like what candidate has the best policy to curb insurgency, or provide more jobs across the Country. We should be debating about a way to fix what is broken, not further break everything by inciting childish political and religious sentiment between people. 

An honest person, more so an honest leader is not intimidated by opposition, he has clear-cut goals and is mature enough to accept defeat, without making a mess of things. In other words, Nigerians should not, at this point feel the need to remind us all, after every minute, through the use of poorly constructed and anaemic sentences, why their candidate is the best and everyone else's is rubbish. In fact, this should bring us all closer and not further separate us. Working together to share ideas will be much more productive than suggesting you or your party to be the best thing to happen to Nigeria since P-Square. 

Going to shift focus to twitter activists to make a point, I take it that if you are reading this article then you have most likely have gained a significant level of education, primary at least. Can you not use the experience you have gained as a Nigerian citizen, to initiate and discuss real issues without bringing trivial issues such as tribe or religion into the matter. Can you talk about measurable commitments your candidate has made, can you reference some of the past achievements of your candidate? If yes, then focus on that, and don't fall into bigotry and the plain hypocrisy of calling others out, you yourself drenched in faults. Can you rather focus on the real issues at hand. Issues which you most certainly know about. 

 

It is definitely a very significant improvement, the number of people engaged in this year's elections, the number of people fed up with life as is, the number of people ready to see positive change happen. It is rather unfortunate that many people, though rightfully angry, are channeling their anger in the wrong direction. I intentionally detach myself from politics of any kind because I do not like the complications and friction it creates, and I cannot tell you "this is who I want and who I believe" can change Nigerian for good, because at the heart of it all, only God knows. The only thing I know is who I THINK can change the Country for good, and this is based on merit and fact alone, not ethnicity and certainly not religion. 

After all the debates, the accusations, the protests, it is abundantly clear that Nigerians want change. There will be no need to stress that fact any longer. Every Nigerian, I suppose, is a free man, and he has the right to do as he pleases, keeping in mind that we all get what we deserve. Therefore, unless you have a positive, informative and objective suggestion to contribute in the hope of creating a better country (And you want to talk), the best thing you can do for Nigeria, really, is to close your mouth, let the forums rest, get a voter's card and choose your candidate. 

As we are now, God knows who is going to lead the country from this year, but we humans have to wait and see. In the end, all I can say is that I am tired of suffering, as you all are, and I only pray, that God blesses Nigeria with a President that is most certainly up to the task of fixing Nigeria for good.

Happy new year by the way, and here is to hoping 2015 will finally be the year Nigeria fulfils that long awaited promise of goodness. Amen. 

My Hinata

In times of peace, you praised me,

In troubling times, you provided comfort

You showed support, when everyone neglected me.

You stood by me, when everyone abandoned me.

You saw my flaws, and you saw through them,

Every time I fell, you held me up.

Of all the trouble I gave, you gave love in return,

Without words, you showed love a hundred times. 

You were honest in everything you did,

But you were caring, and you were gentle.

You had beautiful eyes, you had a beautiful voice,

You gave me strength, and you were patient.

For all the years I failed to see, you sat and you waited

And then finally I realised,

Everything I had always wanted, I found it in you.

It took me so long, but now I knew,

Every mistake I made, every bad turn I took,

Was only part of my journey to being better.

And as others attacked me, 

You saw something even I did not see in myself,

I guess you felt I was worth keeping,

Because you did, and close to your heart.

Placed safely, vouching to never grow apart,

When you first promised, I believed it was another one

One of the many lies people tell.

But here you are, with me, today.

I guess, after a long nap, I am finally awake,

And through everything, I am glad you had the patience to wait. 

I am sure that I love you, as much as you do too,

And I promise to take care of you, the way you took care of me.

You are my everything, but you are my one and only,

You are my everything, girl, you are my Hinata. 

True Love

We fall in love too early, we fall in love with half of what a person consists of, we fall in love with what is right in front of us. We commit ourselves to people we know only as much as they project. 

When we do this, we limit ourselves and we create an environment prone to failure. It is human nature to project our best selves to people, because we seek positive reinforcement. And before we commit, we only see the good in us, and every bad, we make excuses for.

But the truth of the matter is, the true nature of man does not spring from texts and social media kisses or frequent visits to a restaurant or movies. Till you find yourself with someone, with nothing but yourselves, in a legal bond, where responsibility comes before anything, you will never know who a person truly is. 

How many times have you wanted something so bad, and the moment you got it, it became insignificant. The new phone you bought, sleeping next to it the first few days only to carelessly throw it about a few weeks later?

Love is quite complicated. We love different people for different reasons, and one thing we find attractive in one could absolutely repulse us from another.

Before we commit, we should be about fixing ourselves, to have the qualities we seek in another. And instead of actively looking for someone, let it happen, only as it is meant to be. 

Before we commit, make sure we know the difference between material things and what is soulful. Falling in love with someone for their character, for knowing we both can learn and improve each other. 

And no, this does not mean neglecting the material things at all, they matter as well. But when we seek for something in someone, it will be in our interest to seek something that goes beyond the surface before anything.

We can like someone the first day we meet them, we can can become fond of people within months, but how do we know that we truly love someone?

Honesty. Patience. After we have seen each other for who we truly are, and we remain fond of each other, after we have shown our limits and our differences as people and we still like each other... Then maybe there is something worth pursuing. 

Perhaps we have reduced relationships and love to physical attraction/connectivity, but true love goes beyond that. True love consists of a lot of things that have sadly become secondary.

True love is trust, belief, encouragement, support, care, true love is being able to discuss critical issues about life, concerning you and the world at large. It is being able to share responsibility, being able to work towards something great together. True love is noticing flaws in your partner's character and finding non-hostile, creative ways of fixing them.

Love is not easy, it is not easily defined, it is not easily realised. Before you commit to anyone, know that they tick the most important boxes for you. And if they do, be true to it, and work on building yourselves.

In today's society, all the negative aspects of love and relationships are widely celebrated. To be cool, you have to be around all the men/women you can get your hands on, you have to be rude to people, you have to be bad basically. But you have to realise that the people you are trying to impress could care less and probably won't be there when your life turns to shit.

Always seek to improve yourself, not to impress others: Especially when it comes to important things like your wellbeing and love toward others. 

Do things for your benefit, and when you find someone you like, don't let the superficial things deceive you, make sure they have most of the qualities you believe you deserve. Forget about societal expectations, find what works for you and carefully build yourselves. 

If you truly love someone, then I guess it's not what they have, or the spelling of their name or the time it takes for you to get together. If you truly love someone, it is the patience to understand each other, to know each other better. It is the trust you have in each other, and the support you provide each other, the connection you have that goes deeper than surface: these things are what truly matter. 

In essence, the realisation that soulful things are primary and material things secondary will maybe give you a better understanding of how love truly works. And with this, you will maybe be able to better understand what your feelings truly are toward the people you meet in life.  

No Strings Attached

He loved her more than he loved himself and everywhere he went he always came back to her. He could tell other girls he loved them, and maybe he did, but the love he had for her was something bigger than him or her.

And she loved him too, more than she could understand or care to admit and even though she was uncertain of the things she needed, she was sure that she loved him and he meant a lot to her.

And love is not always enough and love was not enough to keep them together, and love turned to hate and it was as though they were ready to tear each other apart.

And for a while, the bond between them got weirder and weaker. And with this realisation, they decided to break away for good. And then came peace, because there was no more weirdness involved. 

With time and age, comes maturity and through this they realised how much they meant to each other, and together they healed and they mended what was once broken. 

The mistakes of the past were lessons learnt, and the bond between both was stronger than it ever was. They loved each other with no strings, and as they grew, they learnt to appreciate that no strings meant no troubles got tangled in between. 

The Artist

To the blue sky he woke every day, and the sounds of cars passing, and people chatting away. People, with their very short attention span he thought, looking at their phones every chance they got, with a cup of coffee on the other hand as they rushed down to work tirelessly for hours just so they could earn enough to get by. 

As always, he folded his makeshift bed and tied it atop his big blue camping bag, a camping bag that had began to lose its colour. No, he did not drink, or smell. He had an easel which he got for a little over 30 dollars and he carried it around everywhere he went.

Everyday he sat at a new location and hoped one or two of the thousands of people that walked by would stop and ask for a painting and in his very good days, he earned 50 to 60 dollars, enough to eat some good meal and get a bed for the night. But he did not, he instead bought more painting materials and books, including good diet plans and healthy living tips for the explorer. Everyday he earned, he invested wisely, and slowly he became better.

One day, a particularly cold Monday morning, as he struggled to set up his "studio" he noticed a man, perhaps in his late thirties, holding what appeared to be a cup of coffee, looking distressed as he sat alone on a park bench.

The painter walked over and asked the stranger what was wrong. Of course, the stranger was reluctant to answer, why would he, it was a homeless man after all.  "I can do two paintings for you free of charge" the painter said. At first, the stranger seemed unbothered, almost as though he had not heard the painter's words. But then his eyes changed, the stranger, as he realised the painter's offer. Keeping his coffee on the side, the stranger said, "yes please, show me what you got" rubbing his palms together as he regained a burst of energy and enthusiasm.

The painting carried and placed his drawing board and 45 minutes later, he had produced "one of the best portraits i've seen myself in" The stranger said. "You have saved me" he added. Clueless, how exactly could his art save a random man sitting on a park bench he wondered. "Here's my card. Come to this address tomorrow. We have business to discuss" said the stranger before getting up to leave. 

The artist got up very early, to give two or three quick sketches the next morning at the price of 1 dollar before heading up to meet with the stranger from yesterday. Outside a tall white building, the stranger sat by the long and wide flight of stairs as the painter approached. "You made it!" He exclaimed, hugging the artist and dragging him towards the building" "I had just one day to produce an artist for the company or risk losing my job. I will admit, i'm a shit scout and I was about to be slapped by reality, but then God gave me another chance. He sent you" "You are about to paint for a bunch of people that will probably judge the person you are from top to bottom. But that does not matter, because you will show them what they've never seen in their miserable pretentious lives"

Hours later, the painter walked out of the building with his signature on a contract that made him 4 million dollars richer. With some of his best paintings up for sale and a place as one of the few creative directors there.

He went back to the University he visited a year earlier to ask for enrolment details. The academic year had started but it was fine by him, he was more than ready and patient enough to wait for a whole year. Taking the train as he usually did, he arrived a familiar part of town, and with a single knock on the door, a girl, probably about 19, opened the door. "Hi, Samira. You are going to college" he said, and she gave him a big hug. She invited him in and for the next few hours, they talked and talked, both excited at life for finally working in their favour. 

After leaving his daughter's place. He went to a place where he used to pray, and at a point sleep when it got too cold. Standing in a small room, with the sound of water dripping from a faulty pipe on the roof, he said to the imam, "in sha Allah, this mosque will be as it should be in the coming months. You gave me shelter when I needed it and this shelter needs some work, so I will" And he did, he kept his promise.

By next year, he had turned the fortunes of the company he worked for around. His daughter was back in college, the local community mosque that once sheltered him was bigger and better.

And through this, every morning before he went to work, he will sit and paint nature before anyone asked to be painted, and he did so for free. And for everything he earned, he shared it with the people that were once like him, homeless, without a roof on their heads.

His only bad habit was that he smoked like a chimney, and he only cut down on his intake after being diagnosed with cancer. Rather than "waste" his earnings on "pointless" treatment that "could not stop the inevitable" he invested in an institution that helped disabled kids as well as kids from underprivileged backgrounds, selling everything he owned and making sure his investment lasted as long as it could even after he had gone. 

In his last days, he chose to go back to sleeping in a subway by night and painting people by day. Eventually, his illness overpowered him. He was not a rockstar or a famous actor. He was not a celebrity and even some of his most valued customers did not know him by name. He was not on the cover of every magazine nor was he known by the public to be the founder of one of the few institutes that catered for the less privileged in that area, nor did they know that he was the sole reason a whole company was saved from dying off.

He believed in himself and he made people happy, he gave even though he had not much, and even though he received less than he gave in return, he was never discouraged to keep giving. He never saw his situation as misfortune, he saw it as an opportunity to be something bigger than the basic human perception of what life must be. 

Achievement

If you are one that wakes up everyday, disappointed with yourself for failing to achieve what you set out to achieve, or for failing to be the person you wish to be by day's end. Be glad that you strive, because striving matters just as much. 

On your first try you will most likely fail; that is not what matters. What matters is that you try again. And again and again until you get it right. 

“Over time, as daily routines become second nature, discipline morphs into habit” Words of wisdom by Twyla Tharp; indeed, if you do something every day, it becomes you, and if good is what you practise and everyday you strive to achieve something great, the number of times you fail only become dumbbells to building your success. 

The whole world telling you that you can't does not carry any weight. If you set your mind to it, and you bring reality into the equation; with persistence, you will achieve more than that which you set out to achieve. You might start with a very specific target, but the sincerity in you, your persistence and the hard work you put may lead you to hit multiple targets at once and successfully.

Serendipity; The iPhone was realised as a result of trying to make something else. With hard work and belief came the realisation that something greater could be achieved; and it happened. The iPhone changed the way the world looks at mobile phones forever. Better yet, the initial idea was realised years later, and the iPad also revitalised the world of tablet computers.

Have your identity, believe in yourself, put in work and do not take no for an answer. Be true to yourself, be confident in the goals you set out to achieve, and when people tell you you can't, show them why you can. 

When people judge you for your shortcomings, ignore them, because everyone knows that we are flawed creatures. The difference between a strong and weak person is that one is mature enough to acknowledge and address every shortcoming. 

Focus on yourself, not others. Do not envy others and their achievements. Do not judge others by their shortcomings, no, focus on yourself and achieve what you want to achieve; focus on building yourself and remind yourself everyday that the ride may not always be smooth. But know that every journey has a destination and only by sitting through the ride will you ever reach that place and beyond. 

Growing Up

As time passes, we grow. Everyday we learn. Life does not always shift in our favour and as we grow older we begin to realise and embrace the fact that every experience matters, good or bad. 

As time passes, and as we grow, we begin to see what matters most in our lives and we begin to think of ways of achieving our goals. Some people want to be the next Beyonce, others want to have a modest and peaceful life, away from all the craziness of life. Whatever our aspirations, as we mature, we begin to work towards achieving something great. 

We meet people along the way, some stay and some don't. But every person plays an important part in building us as people, and if we are wise, we would learn not to take anyone for granted, even the ones that don't mean well. We learn that it benefits us not to build relationships off of deceit and it certainly benefits us not to betray people or the trust they place on us. We do not need to have a million friends, when we have a few honest ones, but we do not have to have a million enemies either. As we mature and grow older, we realise wether friend or not, we strive to be at peace with every single soul we come across. 

We are human and we make mistakes, and sometimes we are selfish in the way we interact with the world but we grow and we realise that it is an everyday struggle to be the best version of us and from this, we strive honestly. We learn to let go of pride, a chronic condition that prevents us from amending broken relationships, from acknowledging our shortcomings, from accepting who we truly are as people. As we grow, we do away with pride, and then we make progress.

We learn that we are not always right, we acknowledge that sometimes, maybe a lot of times, we are at fault and that a different opinion does not mean a reason to fallout. And that we can all live in peace, no matter the difference in age, sex, colour, religion or lifestyle choice. As we grow older, and as we mature, we learn to understand the essence of retaining our values while respecting the values of others, and in that finding peace and comfort everywhere we are.